I don't have the right to be melodramatic about this as I am not the only person who had a difficult childhood, not in a financial sense. In fact, Mama would always try to give me the best. I think the dilemma was - maybe I grew up so fast emotionally and mentally and was not able to cherish being a child.
Like most kids, I look forward to Saturdays - gigising ako ng 8am pero hindi pa ako puwede maglaro nun. Kailangan kong tapusin lahat ng household chores, 2 hours. Then pagkatapos nun, I had an hour to play or worst, wala na mga kalaro ko.
Oftentimes I asked myself "bakit ganoon nag-aaral naman ako mabuti? sumusunod naman ako sa lahat ng gusto?" but I felt it was not enough to make her proud, she always push kahit na alam kong di ko na kaya.
She died early. Only then I realized the answers to my questions, or maybe I should have known the answers earlier but failed to recognize. She always tells me, "kailangan kong matutunan any mga baggy na ito dahil kapag nawala na ako - sarili mo lang aasahan mo, kailangan kong matutong dumiskarte, papunta ka pa lang pabalik na ako".
To my disciplinarian, Happy Mother's Day! Nothing but love and pure gratitude for all the things you have thought and dreamt for me. Thanks for not sugarcoating the world and making me realize that pain exists but will help me to be a better person.
I love you.
Happy Mother's Day also to Arnie's mom, all my aunts, cousins, friends and to all fantastic Nanays out there.
Always remember, the world is a better place because of our mothers.
PS: pak na pak ang pose!
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